What I Learned Last Night Feb 11

Consuming your first steak made by personal Chef aka Smoking Chef
or How to lose you Vegetarianity.
or Strategies on eating Meat with many returns.

Dear Gentle reader,
Over the past few years I have been emerging out of the self righteous gloom of a holier-then-thou vegetarian state. A righteous cause yes that I still believe in but Cest la Vie…

My holier-than-thou vegetarianism all started when I was about 16, and was mostly induced by listening to the Smiths and dating a guy who was also holier-than-thou vegetarian and smith’s fan. Bad combo for this girl and any meat eater. I also have to pay homage to my roots as the vegetar-ianty (a Sarah coined term, thanks girlfriend) was also induced by the rebel in moi growing up in the suburbia of Sacramento, California - fast-food laden, homogenization, one long string of mini-malls with a Gap clothing store at one end of Sacramento and a TGIFs at the other end (and Applebee’s of course). Growing up in this complete lack-age of diversity and culture while listening to those Smiths (sing it with me….you know the words… “Sizzling blood as you savor the flavor of murder…”), and dating the vegetarian, and an upbringing by a Texan father – this combination will turn anyone into a vegetarian. Come on, now!

So I have been coming out of my veggie-shell….or cell…but still remain naive as to the ways of properly cooked meats. Fortunately for moi and you, gentle reader, my emerging from vegetarianism state of being and the fact that I have NEVER cooked my own steak lays the grounds for a good “meat and male” story to tell. After an acupuncturist prescription of “eat red meat” and a certain Smoking Chef’s offer of a personally-made-at-my-home combining of fire and steak, the following is What I Learned Last Night:

When consuming your first personally made steak, be sure to plan for….

1) When consuming your first personally made steak, be sure to plan for also consuming two bottles of red wine. One Washington Janik Cabernet (nice!) and one south African Graham Shiraz, gaining an understanding of Cabernet, not Shiraz, not syrah, not Zinfandel, pairs well with steak….
well. I exaggerate… you need to plan for consuming nearly two bottles of red. Some will be used in wine reduction sauce over steak; some Smoking Chef will spill on floor narrowly missing your prized possession cow hid rug….painted to look like zebra…Poor cow….killed, skinned, and then painted to look like a zebra... The bovine disrespect in my apartment at this point is astounding…. but the spill I didn’t mind, as seen in point 9 below.
2) When consuming your first personally made steak, be sure to plan for:
A mid-meal digestif walk to Kerry Park to view downtown Seattle and the Space Needle….While modeling for Smoking Chef’s camera ….while drinking red wine…. while smoking cigarette like Humphrey Bogart/James dean…..You did learn something from Smoking Chef after all…
3) When consuming your first personally made steak, be sure to plan for:
Staying up until 4 am
4) When consuming your first personally made steak, be sure to plan for:
discovering your blue velvet chaise lounge built for one can seat two “comfortably” went two are determined.

I also learned that:
5) A scrabble game where your opponent throws down all his tiles with the word “PUTTING” across the double word score as his first move is not a scrabble game where hope exists for you. My advice in this situation: move game to velvet blue chaise…built for one…

Cognac is a type of brandy which comes from the Cognac region of France. A distinctive, sophisticated spirit made from grapes… A very dry, caramel colored wine which is double distilled and aged in oak barrels. A lovely nose of butterscotch caramel and vipermoan, but the taste is not for the faint of heart. And not for moi for that matter. The Cognac label V.S.O.P. stands for “very superior old pale.”

When serving cognac, post satisfying losing-your-vegetarianity-steak, there are several things to consider in order to enhance the Cognac tasting experience:
~1) Serve cognac in heated snifter. Fill each glass only one-quarter full with cognac. Since cognac has a much higher alcohol content than wine, avoid heavy pours ….as you’ve already shared two bottles of red with your Smoking Chef…. Otherwise you may end up staying up with Smoking Chef until 4:00 in the morning, on velvet blue chaise built for one.
~2) Serve cognac with dessert. While cognac can be enjoyed on its own or with a meal, it compliments sweets, particularly chocolate well. You’ll discover that the your Julia child poached pears with cognac-infused melted chocolate indeed pairs best with How to Cook a Steak Chef…and cognac. Serving cognac with dessert helps to draw out the nuttier flavors in the cognac and draw out the length of stay of How to cook a steak chef...
~3) Cup your hand around the base of the glass rather than holding the stem. The heat from your hand will warm the cognac slightly, thereby enhancing its bouquet and flavor. If your blue chaise lounge built for one companion’s hands are not available to cup the glass, you may find that those hands are instead cupping your thighs.
~4) While nobody disputes the appeal of hand-warmed brandies sniffed and tasted from large glasses, Cognac is best enjoyed as an after taste while kissing in your entry way. Your first kiss with smoking chef...You will also detect nuances of poached pear, chocolate, tobacco, and rare meat.

the end.